After his death, Osama bin Laden went to paradise.
.
He was greeted by George Washington, who slapped him across the face and
yelled angrily, "How dare you attack the nation I helped conceive!" Then
Patrick Henry punched Osama in the nose and James Madison kicked him in
the groin. .
.
Bin Laden was subjected to similar beatings from John Randolph, James
Monroe, Thomas Jefferson and 66 other early Americans.
.
As he writhed in pain on the ground, an angel appeared. Bin Laden
groaned, "This is not what I was promised!"
.
The angel replied, "I told you there would be 72 Virginians waiting for
you! What did you think I said?"